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Thanks for your feedback.
I've also noticed since upgrading to Lion that I have to hit a key on the keyboard or click the mouse to wake the monitor where as I used to just be able to touch the mouse. I don't know if thats related, but it seems it might be.
This is the new default behaviour of Lion and not caused, controllable or influenced by Remote Buddy. It has already annoyed me ever since I started using Lion Pre-Releases. (For reference, here's a random forum post on this topic from Apple's Support Communities: https://discussions.apple.com/thread/3193005).
I just upgraded to OSX 10.7 Lion and my remote will no longer wake up my monitor from sleep. It worked fine under 10.6.8. My computer is not asleep, the monitor is just in power save mode. I know the commands are being received because when I wake the computer via the keyboard the RemoteBuddy menu is up on the screen.
What Remote Buddy does right now when you press a button is to post "activity" (to wake a sleeping screen) as well as quickly move the mouse by a pixel back and forth (to wake any sleeping screen savers). Both doesn't seem to have an effect under Lion.
The only alternative available right now would be for Remote Buddy to send a keystroke - which it can't actually do, because, depending on where you are, this might trigger an action in an application.
I have already filed a bug report with Apple on this and hope for a solution, soon.
I'm sorry that - for the moment - I can't offer you a solution other than to disable display sleep in System Preferences > Energy.
Best regards,
Felix Schwarz